The importance of credentials

So.. apparently, having alphabet-soup after your name, or some specific-gibberish is supposed to make you more important, or at least, knowledgable in some respect. Usually somehow related to the alphabet-soup or gibberish after one's name.

Well, it seems I want to partake of this silly-fun. I'm going to wind up taking some certification tests for various programs that I've already taken, and will need to study up on to refresh my ailing memory. As it stands, I've already got a few credentials after my name.. little did I know. They haven't shown up in paper-form yet.. but I've earned them, and should proudly display them. And someday.. I will.

Suppose you suddenly have a sharp stabbing pain in your leg..and can't stand on that leg. Or put any weight on it, and it hurts like the dickens to move it. JoeSchmoe off the street tells you that you've broken your shin and need to get it set and splinted and put in a cast..
Okay.. sounds possible.. nice. Take it under advisement.
You go see JoeSchmoe, M.D. ...and suddenly.. whatever he tells you, must be right. He's got the alphabet soup after his name.. and uses bizarre terms like `fracture` and `hairline` and `owie` that, of course, only alphabet-soup people would understand.

Naturally, we assume doctors, lawyers and such `professionals` know what they're talking about. But what about those other alphabet-soup add-ons that we're not so certain of?
What if suddenly, you run into JoeSchmoe, Sr.V.P. of K.P. & J.D. ??.. Do we know what that means? ..Well, I do, because I made it up. This JoeSchmoe is the Crew-chief of a Clean-up crew.. the Senior Vice President of Kitchen Patrol & Janitorial Duties.
Wat about Joe Schmoe, B.Sc. Eng. N.Ph. & T.Dy's ?

Alphabet soup also seems to command a better dollar-amount per hour give up in exchange for labour. But is that the reason one should have it after their name?... Nooooooo... of course not.

So... until my paperwork comes through, and I take these other cert. tests.. I'll just use some Alpha-bits cereal on my resume`... and maybe some cheerios when negotiating a salary.