Thursday, December 11, 2008

'Tis the season

Oy.... more and more I loathe anything with `holiday` in it.

I'm trying to remember when `holiday` was... well.. a holiday! A time for fun and relaxing and laughter and.. stuff like that.

Seems like the last decade or three has been `tis the season... for greed and consumption in amss quantities!` ..and yeh, I'm guilty as anyone, wanting stuff that really isn't important or needed and it's all just stuff and ...well, nothing is built to last anymore.

As I learn more in my accounting class.. I think of the useful life-span of objects.

Once upon a time.. you could go and buy a kitchen table.. and your kids could inherit it and te grandkids would have it as their kitchen table because mom&dad inherited it from you, and if they took care of it.. the grandkids mights inherit it. ...but now.. a kitchen table is lucky to last 20 years at best. And that's going with a good solid wood table. Not one of these cheapie ikea-crapolas that get churned out like sausage-links. I can hear it now.. `Quick Ollie!! The truck is back, turn the handle, turn the handle! They want more crappy furniture that'll last 3 years!`

Ugh....and sigh.

It's the holidays.. which means, typically.. we-the-consumer go into debt to get junk for our friends and family that we think they'll like(and they usually do) and that maybe it'll make them happy. ...well, here's the thing about happy.. it doesn't exist. We think it does.. but really, it's one big snipe-hunt. Doesn't exist..and because we think it does..we `see` or `feel` telltale signs that it's somewhere close.. and maybe just maybe.. giving stuff to people..and getting stuff from people.. yeah man..yeh!..we get to be happy, and we can BE happy.

Good luck. Happy don't exist.

But joy does.. and

Lemme tell ya.. joy exists.. it transcends anything peope can be.. but too many folks would trade real joy in for a smidge of this `happy` thing.

And know.. maybe that 32" true-flat wall-hang lcd tv, too. ...with the 12.1 surround sound system.. and a mini-fridge-end-table so I don't have to get up and go to the kitchen to get myself a cold one....and that leather-recliner..with built-in I don't have to get up and go to the bathroom should the need arise during a movie or football game. And.. and..and..

And then I'll be happy. Once all these things are done, acquired, conquered, stuffed, mounted, plaqued and lacquered.. once I get all the glory for my work and that fat bonus where I'll never have to work again... once that happens, then I'll be happy.

Will you? Will you really?

Except.. happy don't exist.. not really and for true, it don't.

But there IS something about giving stuff to others.. especially when it costs you something - something you can't budget for, even.

Going down to get a falafel with TheKid from my old class(the one looking at divorce)..he mentions `have you noticed how hot WhatsHerFace looks today` ??.. to which I go (and thank You, God, for that perfect opening) "Dude.. I thought you were fighting to get back together with your wife?.. what's this crap about?!".. and RG who is not a Christian, actually agrees with me. (I say `actually` because I was expecting him to be more about personal freedoms than to agree with me). We talk with TheKid for a bit.. agreeing about a lot of things (thanks for the unexpected assist, RG), and convince him that if he is serious about getting back with his wife.. the goings-on with WhatsHerFace ain't in his best interest.

Very cool that TheKid was receptive to this.

Okay.. that's a bit of a sidebar.. RG had owed me some money.. and paid me for it. So.. the day before the encounter with TheKid.. I was meeting a friend for lunch (more falafel..he had a shawarma...mmmmmSO GOOD!)..bought an extra one..and met RG up in the caf. Handed him some money to which he looked all puzzled at me.. I explained why I was giving it to him (in that, the next time I saw him, I was going to tell him to not worry about paying me back..but he had already paid me before I could see him.. stinkin internet)..and offered him my other falafel sandwhich.

Makes me feel good?...not really. But it's still a `nice thing` to do for someone.. forgive them their debt.. repay them their debt, come to think of it. very unexpected.. moreso when you yourself are hurtin.

Which brings me to this thing..

I was wondering around the mall.and stopped in at a store..and I have NO IDEA what possessed me...but I bought some stuff. Women's clothing. From a women's store. With frilly stuff in it, and undergarment type stuff as their specialty.

I am not a woman. I am not comfortable in those stores.

Now before you get all wide-eyed(too late?) at me..

I bought housecoats. Nice, fluffy housecoats. A few of them.

I didn't know why. Still don't, really.

But I know where one of them went, and the other is going.

I remember walking out of the mall, thanking God for my friend who lent me his car to do my shopping..and asking - almost begging - that He'd take the glory for whatever was being done with the housecoat.

and hey.. turns out, God is awesome.. and the person who got the housecoat, as I learned.. has praised Him.

What better thing, really, than to bring a smile to someone's face(I'm assuming they smiled), and to hear that they praise the Lord for even a small thing as some fuzzy-comfy cloth left on a doorstep ??

Now -that- warms my granite chestpiece.

Woke up this morning thanking God that He took the glory for that.

I wouldn't have done this thing of my own volition.. fact of the matter is... I don't like the person who got the housecoat. No logical or rational reason to get them anything. And in my shopping stupor and frazzleness.. God was awesome enough to use me for His glory.

That's my story, and I'm stickin to it.

Sometimes.. life gets us so beat down we feel miserable all the time..and some folks try to escape it by volunteering ot working themselves raw doing things for others.. and none of it works! It might be a temporary thing..but when you do it to get that sense of relief or release or `warm fuzzy`... just don't last and you can feel like this... all kinds of shot up and run ragged and more miserable than when you started.
Not that there's anything wrong with volunteering, don't get me wrong here. you folks can have your "Season of Joy".. when what is really sought is material junk and `happiness`. Don't think I can ever truly comprehend the desire for happiness and such.. much as a friend has tried to explain it to me..and I keep telling her `you know my thoughts on 'happy'`..which circumvents the numerous arguements we've had about happiness.

I'll take some true joy.. joy of serving my Lord...even when I'm not aware of it.

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